(615) 351-8355 jerry@jerryessary.com

What is Coaching?


Definition of coaching

Coaching involves a relationship built on trust and mutual respect. It is an alliance that is designed by you and your coach for the purpose of helping you realize your full potential. Coaching helps you identify goals and, at its best, is a very collaborative journey to achieving those goals.

A coaching relationship involves structured conversations, or coaching sessions, that include:

  • Being listened to actively and deeply
  • Being asked powerful questions to prompt new insights
  • Generating options and expanding possibilities for decision making
  • Identifying and avoiding obstacles to your progress
  • Focusing on forward progress and being action oriented

In coaching sessions, you will be encouraged to look at your situations from a different perspective and to be willing to act differently as you gain new insights. Your coach’s objective will be to help you get to the point of having confidence and commitment to a line of action that you have identified for yourself.

Things you can expect of your coach

You can expect your coach to:

  • Be honest and have integrity
  • Encourage and support you
  • Give you positive  feedback and share relevant best practices
  • Deal with the most difficult issues that are raised and not “step over” anything in the conversation
  • Not offer therapy or counseling and to refer you to a qualified person if such help is needed
  • Hold you accountable to your commitments to the level you wish to be held accountable
  • Come to each coaching session prepared and ready to engage
  • Hold no preconceived ideas, personal assumptions, or judgments about the client
  • Keep in strict confidence everything that is shared in the coaching relationship

A few key points about CONFIDENTIALITY

  • What is said here stays here, except where specific permission has been granted
  • Notes are kept private
  • The fact of a coaching relationship is confidential
  • Coaching confidentiality is limited to terms of law
  • Records (name and hours only) shared with ICF for accreditation purposes only

Coach’s expectations of the person being coached (PBC)

As a person striving to be your best you are expected to:

  • Come to each session ready to focus and move forward
  • Follow through and complete actions that you set for yourself
  • Honor time commitments (keep session appointments, call on time, and end calls on time)
  • Bring a 100% commitment to the coaching relationship and process
  • Be honest, authentic, and open
  • Be coachable in that you are willing to take action and experience transition
  • Give feedback on the coaching process
  • Honor the coaching relationship, the coach, and yourself


Each coach and PBC will design the coaching relationship to fit the needs of the PBC and the parameters of the coach.  Key aspects of the coaching relationship that need to be addressed at the beginning of the relationship include:

  • What the initial session will involve (any prep work from PBC or additional assessment tools to be used)
  • The phone number to be called (the PBC will always initiate the call)
  • Parameters for email contact and unscheduled calls to coach
  • Cancellation policy (typically coaches require 24-hour notice)
  • Particular wishes from PBC concerning how the coach logs each session, how notes are taken, and the level of accountability to the coach

Through your coaching relationship, you can expect to take actions that move you toward the goals you have set for yourself.  It is your coach’s goal to help you accomplish your agenda.  As a result of coaching, you should take actions that:

  • Have a specific scope and timeframe
  • Are quantifiable – you know whether you have accomplished it or not
  • Bring about progressive achievement of desired and worthy goals
  • Produce observable shifts in behavior so that actions align with goals 

Why would someone use a coach?

  • To achieve more in less time with greater life and ministry satisfaction
  • To go where they have not gone before
  • To grow forward in faith and function
  • To reach their full kingdom potential in life and ministry
  • To move from dialogue to action by accelerating the pace and depth of learning, transitioning in areas of  ministry, and clarifying spiritual and strategic journeys

What benefits would a Christian leader or congregation receive from a coaching relationship?

  • Accelerates the pace and depth of learning
  • Clarifies spiritual and strategic journeys
  • Moves from dialogue to action
  • Identifies obstacles to growth
  • Helps with transitioning in areas of ministry
  • Moves from frustration to fulfillment
  • Enables more achievement in less time with greater satisfaction
  • Helps to reach full Kingdom potential
  • Stimulates vision
  • Builds teams
  • Creates community and relationships
  • Facilitates improvement
  • Reframes ministry descriptions
  • Provides support for life transitions
  • Creates accountability
  • Discernment of the Holy Spirit’s leadership
  • Develops prayer partnerships
  • Discover and maximize strengths

How do I get started with a coach?

Now that you have read  through the “What is coaching?” material and you are ready to get started here is what you do…

  • Go to the homepage on this site and select “Meet Your Coach” tab.
  • You will see Jerry Essary’s bio and  email address.
  • Contact Jerry Essary via  email and give him your contact information. He will contact you within 24 hours and you will be on your way!
  • While you are waiting for Jerry Essary to contact you read the Coaching Covenant that is found at the bottom of the Resources and  Links page
  • If you have questions not answered on this sight please direct them to  Jerry Essary at 615-351-8355 or jerry@jerryessary.com